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'09 Authors Insider Tips

Everything About Epublishing
by Angela James
Digital Publishing & Print
Common Myths of Epublishing
Ebook Formats and Devices


FictionCraft
by Louisa Burton
Compelling Characters
Point of View, Part I
Point of View, Part II
Learning to Love Conflict
Story Structure
Keep ‘em Guessing
Keep it Simple
Keep Your Writing Real
The Importance of Pacing


Literary Streetwalker
by M. Christian
New World of Publishing
To Blog Or Not To Blog
Meeting & Making Friends
Thinking Beyond Sex
Selling Books
Walking the Line
e-book, e-publisher, e-fun
Still More E-book Fun


Shameless Self-Promotion
by Donna George Storey
Our Journey Begins
Pitches and Bios
Websites, Blogs & Readers
Publicists, Press Kits and...
Viva the Internet
Adventures in Cyberspace
Promoting In the Flesh
Make Your Own Movie
Bigger is Better
Looking Back, Planning Ahead


Two Girls Kissing
by Amie M. Evans
Questions to Ask Yourself...
Tough All Over


The Write Stuff
by Ashley Lister
Ideas
Practice Makes Prefect
5 Books for Fiction Authors
Poetry In Motions
Six Serving Men
Ashley Lister is Anal
Stealing Ideas
Celebrating Poetry


2009 Smutters Lounge

Ashley Lister Submits
by Ashley Lister
Myths
Graduation


Cooking Up A Storey
by Donna George Storey
A Year of Living Shamelessly
Adultery, Exhibitionism ...
John Updike Made Me Do It ...
Story Soup: Forbidden ...
Lessons from Amazon
Naked Lunches ...
Erotic Alchemy
Secrets of Seduction
Are You a “Real” Writer?
Don’t Fondle My Sentence


Cracking Foxy
with Robert Buckley
The Passionate Taphophile
Havens on Earth
A Knight Without Armor
Jail-Baiting
Magic Carpet Rides
Getting Hammered
Keep It Quiet
Hang Around for a Spell


Get All Worked Up
with J.T. Benjamin
Worked Up About Why
Worked Up About Why, Part II
All Worked Up About Porn
The Catholic Church
Purity Movement
The National Crisis
The Future
About Homosexuality
Public Indiscretions


Pondering Porn
with Ann Regentin
Premature Ejaculation
Auctioning Off What?


Sex Is All Metaphors
by Jean Roberta
Who's Who Around the Table
Retro-Shame
Ritual Sex
Mixed Legacy
The Spectrum of Consent
Drawing the Line
Marriage without the Hype
The Distracting Smirk
Innocent Guns
Gardens of Earthly Delights


Provocative Interviews

Between the Lines
with Ashley Lister
Anneke Jacob
D L King
Kristina Lloyd
Lisabet Sarai
Mitzi Szereto
Portia Da Costa
Shanna Germain
Sommer Marsden
Susan DiPlacido


Guest Appearances

Marketing a Self-Published Novel
by Jeanne Ainslie

Cracking Foxy

by Robert Buckley

Keep It Quiet

 

Cracking FoxyI wasn't at Woodstock.
 
Even with the benefit of hindsight and all the tales that have been told of that legendary mud fest—wholesale casual sex al fresco not being the least of them—I think I would have avoided it.
 
I have an aversion to crowds, even friendly ones. I like to be able to extend my arms and not worry about touching another human being. I've found that the denser the crowd, the denser the people who comprise it. This was never more apparent than during my one and only visit to Disneyworld. It was an obligatory visit, instigated by my mom who abhorred the thought that my kids might be deprived of the magic kingdom.
 
We made the trip in the middle of August—the alleged off-season. It never got cooler than 97 Fahrenheit. The lines to everything were miles long. We tried to catch a bite to eat in one of the cavernous cafeteria type eateries they have there. I got the food while the wife secured the table and sat with the two girls. Balancing two trays I tried to reach them, but a solid wall of humanity, dumb as cattle, stood between us and refused to part.
 
"If you don't get out of my way, folks, I can't get out of yours." No response and no effect. In situations like these I will fall back on my last resort: act crazy. Talk out loud about tossing trays and hurting people, make unintelligible but dangerous sounding noises. The herd did eventually part.
 
I don't like being in places where I can't hear my own voice, or the voice of a person or persons sitting at the same table as me. I regret the passing of the conversation lounge, or the quiet pub or cafe where ideas were exchanged, even trivial ones, and wit was appreciated.
 
The most popular bars in my neighborhood are loud places, with multiple TVs tuned to multiple sporting events. There is much yelling and patrons talking over each other. They give me a headache.
 
But I think we are living in a noisy age with a lot of people straining to be heard, if only to prove to the world that they are here along with the rest of us.
 
Being the hardcore romantic that I am, it occurred to me as I recently watched a group of twentysomethings at the local Beerworks, that loud was the antithesis of romantic. The din of the place is always in the higher decibels. You can't really eavesdrop, which makes your efforts at observation all the more focused. I supposed they were friends or work colleagues, and I could see their mouths open ever wider and their gesticulations become more frantic the longer they sat together. But perhaps together in no way described their body language.
 
I began to discern that they were moving away from each other, either leaning back or being very fastidious about maintaining a buffer. It was an oddly cold arrangement. And when they left, they scattered.
 
Just a block away some years past I often frequented a tiny tavern. It was cozy in every sense of the word. And it was quiet. And as tiny as it was, I recall times when friends and work colleagues gathered for whatever occasion du jour, squeezing within its modest capacity. We drank, and talked and, as I recall, we would often end up, out of necessity, in a sort of group embrace, snuggled together, arms around the shoulder of the person next to us. It was not unusual for people to pair off after rubbing thighs and hips together. It was fun.
 
That little tavern closed down some years ago. I recall I got laid off from my job the same week. I don't know which upset me more.
 
Quiet, intimate places are rare these days. When you find one, they don't seem to do that well. It's a louder time, a noisier time, and I'm guessing, a less romantic time.
 
Among people I work with in their twenties and early thirties I often hear about how hard it is to meet and initiate a romantic relationship. Lonely guys and girls advertise on Craigslist, enroll in online dating services, engage in social abominations such as speed-dating. It sounds like a bleak and sterile landscape where an affair of the heart has little hope of taking root much less flourish.
 
Get a group of healthy young people, sit them in a circle on the floor or a round table that's not quite large enough to accommodate them, dim the lights, and just have them talk about trifles. And I guarantee, by the time it's time to go home, some of them will be thinking about going home with someone else.
 
And let's not let the youngsters have all the fun. Anyone know a place so cozy you might have to rub up against someone else, but where it's never crowded? If you do, give me a shout; I'll buy the first round.

Robert Buckley
September 2009


If you have comments or question about this column, please send them to Robert Buckley

Read more of Robert Buckley's Cracking Foxy in 2009 ERWA Archive.

______
"Cracking Foxy" © 2009 Robert Buckley. All rights reserved. Content may not be copied or used in whole or part without written

About the Author: Robert Buckley is senior fiction editor at ERWA. His stories have been published in various anthologies, including editions of Mammoth Book of Best New Erotica and the Coming Togther series of altruistic erotica.



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'09 Movie Reviews

Blame It On Savanna
Review by Byrdman

Cry Wolf
Review by Spooky

Faithless
Review by Spooky

Heaven or Hell
Review by Oranje

House of Wicked
Review by Diesel

The Office: An XXX Parody
Review by Spooky

This Ain't The Partridge Family
Review by Spooky


'09 Book Reviews

Anthologies

A Slip of the Lip (ebook)
Review by Jean Roberta

Best Women's Erotica '09
Review by Lisabet Sarai

Bottoms Up
Review by Ashley Lister

Enchanted Again
Review by Victoria Blisse

Frenzy
Review by Kathleen Bradean

Girls on Top
Review by Ashley Lister

In Sleeping Beauty’s Bed
Review by Ashley Lister

Libidacoria (Poetry)
Review by Ashley Lister

Licks & Promises
Review by Ashley Lister

Like a Thorn (ebook)
Review by Lisabet Sarai

The Mile High Club
Review by Ashley Lister

Nexus Confessions: Vol 5
Review by Victoria Blisse

Nexus Confessions 6
Review by Victoria Blisse

Oysters & Chocolate
Review by Kristina Wright

Playing with Fire
Review by Ashley Lister

Sexy Little Numbers Vol 1
Review by Ashley Lister

Up for Grabs
Review by Lisabet Sarai

Novels

A 21st Century Courtesan
Review by Donna G. Storey

The Ages of Lulu
Review by Lisabet Sarai

Amanda’s Young Men
Review by Kristina Wright

As She's Told
Review by Ashley Lister

Bedding Down
Review by Victoria Blisse

Broken
Review by Ashley Lister

Brushes & Painted Dolls
Review by Lisabet Sarai

Cassandras Chateau
Review by Ashley Lister

The Edge of Impropriety
Review by Kristina Wright

Exposure
Review by Kathleen Bradean

Free Pass
Review by Ashley Lister

The Gift of Shame
Review by Victoria Blisse

Kiss It Better
Review by Ashley Lister

The Melinoe Project
Review by Lisabet Sarai

Mortal Engines & The ...
Review by Ashley Lister

The New Rakes
Review by Ashley Lister

Ninety Days of Genevieve
Review by Victoria Blisse

Obsession: An Erotic Tale
Review by Kristina Wright

Sarah's Education
Review by Ashley Lister

Seduce Me
Review by Lisabet Sarai

Lesbian Erotica

Lesbian Cowboys
Review by Kathleen Bradean

Night's Kiss
Review by Jean Roberta

Where the Girls Are
Review by Jean Roberta

Gay Erotica

Animal Attraction 2
Review by Kathleen Bradean

Boys in Heat
Review by Vincent Diamond

Faewolf
Review by Lisabet Sarai

The Low Road
Review by Jean Roberta

Personal Demons
Review by Jean Roberta

Ready to Serve
Review by Vincent Diamond

The Secret Tunnel
Review by Kathleen Bradean

Shuck
Review by Kathleen Bradean

Transgressions
Review by Vincent Diamond

Non-Fiction

Best Sex Writing '09
Review by Kristina Wright

The Big Penis Book
Review by Rob Hardy

Erotic Encounters
Review by Rob Hardy

The Forbidden Apple
Review by Rob Hardy

Hollywood’s Censor
Review by Rob Hardy

Lady in Red
Review by Rob Hardy

Licentious Gotham: Erotic...
Review by Rob Hardy

Live Nude Elf
Review by Rob Hardy

Live Nude Girl
Review by Rob Hardy

The Other Side of Desire
Review by Rob Hardy

Scripts 4 Play
Review by Ashley Lister