Impotency
How Do You Handle It?

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From Jane
Oh for chrissake, Anonymous, you are in desperate need of an attitude adjustment, much more so than a hard-on. [see Anonymous' Entry below] A hard-on hardly defines a man, it simply defines penetration. And there's a zillion women who can't orgasm via penetration, it takes direct clitoral stimulation. So a penis doesn't even define good sex.

You want to define yourself as a lover, learn how to give good head, learn how to finger a women to orgasm, and get over your soft dick. Does she want penetration? Buy a dildo, and learn how to use it to her satisfaction.

What I'm trying to say is a dick is very easy to replace. However, the man it's attached to is not. 

I know what I'm talking about. My boyfriend has been impotent (due to a skiing accident) for the last  year of our 2 year relationship. Yes, he went through the 'I'm no longer a man' thing, but as soon as he moved out of his self-pity phase, and realized it wasn't his dick that made him a man, he became a fabulous lover, a champion skier, and I love him more now then then when he had a functioning penis. 

By the way, he is HUNG. Yes, a huge fat gorgeous penis, no longer working. So you can imagine how much he identified his maleness via his penis. It was a rough road, and sometimes still is. But once he realized that a cock is just a cock, he stop letting it define him. You can do the same, just get over yourself, and start looking at the man you are rather what your dick made you.

From Anonymous
When I was 28 I was involved in a motorcycle accident that crushed and subsequently damaged one of my testes. It looks normal but the blunt trauma caused it internal damage where it does not produce testosterone or semen. I have always had problems with erections and reaching orgasm.

I am now 48 and even with Viagra and other ED drugs including Caverject/Edex, there are times when it just won't get hard. I ignore it during lovemaking but it still bothers me. It has without a doubt left some angry bitter feelings especially since I am now on testosterone replacement therapy.

 To a woman it might not be a big deal as there are other ways to achieve pleasure, but to a man it is a big deal. It's almost as if it is what defines what being a man is. Just my thought as I'm sure others will disagree.

When it stops working completely, I will give serious thought to just ending my life. I'm done, and the journey sucks.

From William Scape
I started using paxil an anti depressant medication when I was 25-26 years old. Before I started using paxil, I had no problems getting erections and having powerful orgasms.

I noticed a loss in sex drive after using paxil, and it made me angry. The reason why I went on paxil because I was depressed about women rejecting me over and over again. It was the wrong decision to start using paxil.

I haven't been on paxil for 5 years. My hormones are still Ok, could be better. Sex drive? at age 30, it's great. takes me a long time to orgasm during sex, which isn't bad.

The best thing: No more depression about rejection from women. I feel that being a bachelor at age 30 is cool. I don't try to meet women at bars and nightclubs because I'm tired of playing "phone tag" with women. I wish I could have my normal orgasms back, but I chose to let women's opinions bother me, thought paxil would solve the problem and I was truly wrong.

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