Porn and Relationships
Hot or Not?

Here's a couple of first-class porn sites to enjoy together...

• For the Girls - Ladies, stop trawling through male oriented sites and check out the real deal. For the Girls is a smart, sophisticated approach to women's sexuality; hot hardcore sex without all that 'cum sluts' and 'horny whore' jazz. For the Girls is empowering, hip, intelligent, and sizzling with heat. A must visit for women and couples.

• Fucking Machines is all about sex machines, sultry girls and what these amazing gadgets do to them them—and for them. Includes thousands of incredibly sexy pictures and videos of that include custom made mechanical fucking machines. Check out the extensive free previews of this unique, wild, toe-curling site. Highly recommended.

From Experienced Chick
Ok, take it from me because I too experienced all the crappy side effects that come from being with a guy that's into porn ... a little too much!

#1 Porn addiction is real, it is an addiction and guys can become hooked. The bad thing is, they don't realize it!

#2 Borderline porn addicts can be stopped ... and this is how.

Stop Your Guy From Watching Porn All The Time:  It's simple ... turn the tables! Go to the XXX store and buy toys, big toys, toys that are intimidating to look at and play with them behind locked doors. Rent your own porn movies and hide them, act strange about the computer and purposely do your own "Google" searches but use search terms like "1 woman, 2 guy sex", "How to please yourself", "Bonding with your vibrator" and see how quick your guy starts showing some affection!

Not to mention how quick all the porn will leave the house!

Trust me ... it works!

From Sarah
Kat, [see Kat's entry below] you were having sex 3 weeks after your baby was born!? Good grief. I have three kids, and the last thing I wanted 3 weeks after the births was sex. 5 or 6 weeks recuperation worked for me. And yes, my husband looked at porn, and masturbated a lot during those childbearing years. We're married now 36 years, and yes he still watches/reads porn, and yes he still masturbates to it. And yes, we still have a good sex life. 

So I suggest you calm down and give yourself time to recuperate from the physical efforts of giving birth, and from the emotional aspects also. You'll be on an emotional rollercoaster for a while. Ask your boyfriend for backrubs, foot rubs, a chance to sleep late while he takes care of baby, get him involved. 

And don't insist he doesn't watch porn, because you put yourself in a no win situation. Unless that's all he does is watch porn (I'm talking a addiction) and has no time for you, porn is harmless and does not lead to cheating. And for chrissake, don't compare yourself with porn stars! 

From Union Chick
I am in a wonderful relationship and very happy. This is my first experience with watching porn with a boyfriend. It's hard to understand the different emotions that come over me. I enjoy watching it with him and alone, however, I still wonder the reasoning behind what seems to me to be an obsession with porn. The only thing I get upset with is when I know he goes downstairs or in the bathroom for long periods of time and I know he's masturbating without me. It infuriates me for some reason! 

This weekend, we didn't have sex at all together. After he had his fun without me, I went in the bedroom and decided to enjoy myself. It makes me sad that he doesn't want to have sex with me all the time. However, I enjoy masturbating alone too so maybe it's not fair for me to get upset with him. I know he loves me, but sometimes I feel he is being disrespectful. How do I deal with it?!

From Anonymous
I'm only so-so with porn. My DH [Dear Husband] is very into it and I think after watching these movies it has effected his style of love-making and not for the better. I don't like all of that exaggerated sex you see in these movies. Especially some of the oral stuff. Men should understand this about women, women are tactile as opposed to visual like men. It's all about the touch. I've only seen one movie where a man pleasured a woman orally that turned me on. He was gentle with his licking and sucking. That's what women really like. Touch me the right way, my whole body. Porn is for men.

From Been There
I've known my husband for 21 years, married 17. I always thought in my mind, he would never cheat. He's the "usual" guy that goes to work same time, comes home same time. Never goes out with friends, never wants to take me out. Hes a homebody. Five months ago, I found he's been on the internet at work. I visited him for lunch and found a website url on his desk. When I got back to work, I typed it in and found it was a porn site. At home I questioned him and he said he was given the website by a customer and didn't go into it because he wasn't interested. Two weeks later I visited him for lunch and told him I want to see his computer. There it was! All porn, every day, all day long. He put alot of effort into keeping it a secret from his boss and me. His 4 months of porn (as he said) turned out to be 6 mths on his computer and 3 years on the computer at an empty desk in his office. He started with Playboy and Sports Illustrated. No harm! As I perused the files, the longer he was on there, the worst the sites got. He started to search porn.... BDSM, incest, and his favorites teenage girls. He visited 107 sites just on his computer in 4 months time. Then came the sex/swinger/dating sites. And lastly, sex chat websites.

As they say it's progressive and extremely harmful to anyone in a relationship -- especially mine -- I'm his wife. I've never kept sex from him and always thought we had a good sex life. I'm open minded and find nothing wrong with a pinup calendar or flipping thru Playboy magazines. (I got them for him). He tells me I'm the only person that matters in his life and he can't live without me. Yet he spent 3 1/2 years viewing porn (especially teens) and kept it all a secret. Having opened my eyes, I found him lying about other things in his life. I've also found him to be missing during lunch at work, which he denies. (Lap dances and peep shows are just down the block).

Yes, all of this is cheating or better yet, destructive to any relationship. I've been dealing with this since April and despite my efforts, I have not been able to come to terms with this. I know something was wrong a couple of years ago when our sex life slowed down to once a month, if that. I kept asking him what was wrong? Nothing was the answer. He was tired, or didn't feel well. Now I know it wasn't my imagination. It seems the sex and intimacy we had was taken by porn and the progressiveness of it. I can no longer trust him. He says he lies to me, because he doesn't like when I get mad at him. I guess that's his reasoning for being irresponsible. He thinks I'll get over it because it wasn't a big deal (his porn). He was just curious. He risked his job and his marriage to view porn and sex chat.

Guys, you have to be responsible for your actions. Taking your intimacy outside the relationship is suicide. The emotions and thoughts are so intense for me, I've slipped into a depression. I've become obsessive with what else is he hiding? I feel hurt, angry, confused, betrayed, and feel he has no respect for me at all. His selfishness and lying has ruined our lives. I feel very lonely inside, even when he's in the house. Well now I'm on depression medication and see a therapist. Divorce is my next step.

I just thought I'd tell you my story.

From OTE
I have always enjoyed porn. Well certain flavors of porn that feature women having real pleasure and that is all that I care about.

For the last year or so, my porn has been limited to m'lady's and my own homegrown porn. The video cameras were cheap and copies are made for me and for her only. Watching our own porn, I have been able to watch m'lady during the entire sex act and see exactly what sends her out between the stars. During sex I'm way too focused to see the entire picture, yet upon reviewing the tape, every subtlety becomes obvious.

Yes, porn works for me and m'lady. Watching the two of us enjoy each other may eliminate any fantasies we have about other partners, but so what. Our reality is so much better than some impossible and unrealistic fantasy. With each review of the tape, I learn more about m'lady's wants, hungers and needs. As I'm most turned on by watching a woman orgasm, the more I know about her, the more I can become her greatest lover.

For women, consider the female centric porn available from Candida Royalle's Femme Productions. Even an old man like me enjoys her quality fem-centric videos that feature a story line that leads her female protagonists to mind-blowing sex. Better still, pour a couple glasses of wine and sit on the couch with your lady and watch it together.

Page:   1  |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5
___________________

Interested in this topic? Share your thoughts with us.

  E-mail this page

Copyright © 1996 and on, Erotica Readers Association, Inc.
All Rights Reserved World Wide. Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or
medium without express written permission is prohibited.