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From Anonymous
We've been visiting clubs for about 10 years. Some lessons we've learned include the following:

-Both wife and I are well known in our community, so we generally visit out of town clubs - usually 5-6 times per year in conjunction with business trips and vacations.

- All clubs have the rule, "No means no!" However, we'd also like to add, "Yes means yes, but only within the confines of the club." One bad experience locally early on and the out of town club policy above was born.

- Do your homework well ahead of time. We're on a few message boards which can make recommendations by city and fill us in on the demographics and type of clientele at specific clubs.

- Don't feel like you have to partner up on every visit. It took us a couple of tries before we made a connection.

- Be open-minded about who you partner up with. One time we met a couple in a Miami club that was our absolute polar opposite (more conservative, a little older) . . . and they absolutely took us to school. Absolutely mind blowing!

- It doesn't take a genius to figure out that fit people make more connections. I took off about 25 lbs about 3 years ago and it's made all the difference in the world.

- Most people at clubs don't look like models (we certainly aren't perfect), but at least look your best. Put on some nice clothes, wear some nice jewelry, get your hair done, etc., etc. People you meet will notice and appreciate the effort.

- Finally, keep in mind that visiting clubs is like a spice. A little bit can go a long way. Avoid making going to clubs the focus of your relationship.

From Mike
A few months ago I came across a group of friends discussing a local swingers club, we decided to go along for a drink just to see what was going on. During the evening we watched couples in groups making all sorts of wonderful love which in itself was beautiful, we started chatting with another couple and we slowly got into the 'swing' of things, suddenly my wife was half naked, sucking the breast of this other woman, she had such a lovely look in her eye and between us we spoke silently. 

By the end of the night I was making love to my wife whilst she licked another woman out, and I was banging this other woman whilst my beautiful wife gave her partner a deep throat, all intertwined together. It was a wonderful experience and we have vowed to do it again, we won't be as nervous again the next time..... and there will be an next time. Our personal lovemaking has been brilliant since and we still fantasize over her girlfriends ... mmm nice. Best of both world for me (and her).

From Phil & Sandy
My wife and I are in our late fifties, an out-going couple with many friends. Amongst them are husbands and single men my wife finds attractive and there are wives and single women I find attractive. It became a source of frustration that at parties we'd each meet someone we found attractive yet not desiring to cause problems or an argument in public we'd both hold off from becoming too intimately involved with whomever we had met. 

As a result we had two or three earnest discussions about sex - what we wanted in our marriage, what we wanted as fun outside our marriage and the risks we'd take if we did indulge. To avoid the possible jealousies and anxieties we agreed, after much discussion, to first test ourselves by going to a swing club. Fortunately we picked the right place, it was more like a private house than a club. My wife partnered with three men and came away feeling very satisfied and, as a result, we have held off going over the top on relationships with people we might meet at parties. 

The visit to the swing club produced an immediate spike in our own one-on-one sexual activity, and we agreed to visit the swing club once a month until we either got bored or it became part of our lifestyle.

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