holidays

Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is in two weeks. What to do? What to do?

You could go out to dinner with your loved one and buy them flowers. Catch a romantic movie. Go for a walk in the park or on the beach.

That was, until Covid reared its ugly head. So, what are some good ways to celebrate the Day of Love while isolating and wearing masks?

There are plenty of things you can do. Turn off your phone and unplug the computer. Here are some suggestions for fun things to do on Valentine’s Day.

Breakfast in bed. Buy some bed trays and enjoy your poached eggs, bacon, sausage, and hash browns in bed with your loved one. Even better – get up before your loved one does and make breakfast while they’re still sleeping. Once finished – assuming the delicious smells do not wake up your partner – wake them up and feed them! One of my favorite breakfast dishes is crab cakes eggs benedict. You can’t go wrong with eggs benedict especially if crab meat is involved (unless you are allergic or don’t like seafood).

Cook a lovely dinner at home. Both of you pitch in in the kitchen. Make it special. Why not try your hand at something you’ve never made before? While I bake, my husband cooks. I make the junk food, LOL. My husband made orange chicken with brown jasmine rice for dinner today. It was amazing! Make the meal super special by getting out the good dishes and popping open a bottle of fine wine or bubbly. If you aren’t comfortable with a fancy meal, go simple but delicious. Tonkatsu and rosemary chicken (like Shake N Bake, but better) are two of our go-to meals when we want simple but good. Plus, I can make these dishes. If I can make them, anyone can. You’re reading a post from someone who can burn water. 🙂

If cooking isn’t your thing, order takeout from a good restaurant. Many restaurants that are open now offer takeout and curbside pick-up. The sky’s the limit. You could go for the usual Chinese or Mexican, or something more elaborate. Put the food in a warm oven as soon as you get it home to resurrect it in case it gets too cold.

Why merely buy a card and sign it when you can write a love letter? I like note cards with beautiful ocean themes on the front. Pen a beautiful note telling your loved one why you care so much.

Buy a bag of X rated candy hearts. I’ve seen them at Amazon. Some of them have saying such as “SPANK ME”, “LICK ME”, “TEASE ME”, “RIDE ME”. You get the idea. You can exchange these candies and act out the instructions. Loads of fun!

You don’t have to go to Spencer Gifts at the mall to get sexy playing cards or coupons anymore. Create your own! Create a set of coupons your partner may cash in at any time. Suggestions for messages include “Give a half hour back rub”, “good for one strip tease”, and “Voyeur: watch me”.

What kinds of sex toys do you like? Try couples sex toys like a dildo harness or warming scented massage oil. I used to write sex toys reviews for Babeland, California Exotics, and other companies. There are sex toys out there for every fetish and desire. I recommend the silicone toys over the jelly rubber ones. They are more hygienic. Yes, they cost more, but they are worth it. Some good high-end brands are Jimmy Jane and Lelo. My favorite sex toy company is Lelo, from Sweden.

Try a little light bondage. You don’t have to go full Marquis de Sade here. A flogger whip, blindfold, and plush cuffs make for a fun and relaxing evening. If you are more advanced, try shibari – erotic Japanese rope bondage.

Get naked and paint each other with water-soluble body paint! The tactile sensations will turn you on and the whole idea sounds like fun anyway. You’ll laugh as you tickle and touch each other. Who knows what that could lead to? 🙂

Enjoy a romantic movie. Some good movies for Valentine’s Day are “Pride and Prejudice”, “The Princess Bride”, “When Harry Met Sally”, and “P. S. I Love You”.

Game night! Play a board game or computer game together. Make sure the wine and/or bubbly are flowing to make the game even more exciting.

Read naughty stories to each other. There are many good erotic and romantic books and short stories out there for you to enjoy. You can find recommendations on this web site. There are also my books. My Amazon Author Page is here: https://www.amazon.com/author/elizabethblack

Listen to music together. You can go for your favorite bands or listen to something especially naughty such as Lords of Acid. My husband and I like to play what we call “Dueling iTunes”. He’ll play a song and then I’ll play one. We set up our computers so the songs play on the TV. Sing along and have fun.

If you are lucky enough to have a large bathtub – or better yet a hot tub – toss in your favorite scented oil, bubbles, or bath bomb and enjoy a good, long, warm soak together. Make sure you have chocolates, berries, and champagne handy. Don’t forget the romantic music!

Once Covid lifts and it’s safe to go to a hotel, book a room with a hot tub. I have Hilton Honors, and I’ve used points to get steep discounts on hotel rooms with hot tubs in them. Where I live, the Hampton Inn (part of Hilton Honors) sometimes offers jacuzzi rooms starting at $150 per night, which isn’t bad for a room with a hot tub, fridge, and microwave. Order delivery or bring back food from a restaurant. Don’t skimp on dessert. Some of my favorite desserts are crème brûlée, chocolate mousse, and ice cream.

If you live in a warmer climate, enjoy Valentine’s Day outdoors. Star gaze or sit in comfortable chairs and talk about anything under the sun. Just remember to socially distance and to wear a mask when appropriate.

Make Valentine’s Day your own and enjoy it with your partner. Keep in mind you don’t have to limit yourself to Valentine’s Day. These suggestions work regardless of the time of year. Turn every day into Valentine’s Day if you wish! Supercharge your love life with fun, games, and toys. You won’t be disappointed, and neither will your partner.

UPDATE: I just learned that Kraft has come out with a PINK Mac and cheese that tastes like… candy! Just in time for Valentine’s Day. If you have a wicked sense of humor, make some of that up for your loved one. It’ll be talked about for years to come. LOL

Ho! Ho! Ho! A Compendium of Christmas Movies

While Christmas has passed, many celebrate through Epiphany on January 6. This time of year, I like to play New Age and Celtic Christmas music, bake cookies, decorate the house, trim the tree, and watch Christmas movies.

There are the classic movies like “It’s A Wonderful Life”, “A Charlie Brown Christmas”, and “We’re No Angels” that I watch every year. I also like unusual Christmas movies like “The Ref”, “Joyeux Noël”, and “Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale”. “The Ref” is about a bickering married couple held hostage by a cat burglar over Christmastime. It’s very funny. “Joyeux Noël” is about the World War I Christmas truce. I go into more detail about “Rare Exports” below. Hallmark plays Christmas movies year round, but this time of year they are especially precious – and predictable. There is comfort in predictability, especially during a year that sucked as much as 2020. Here is a drinking game about Hallmark Christmas movies.

Take a drink when a character’s name is related to Christmas (Holly, Nick, Chris, etc.).

Take a drink when a “big city” person is transplanted to a small town.

Take a drink when a newcomer partakes in an old family/town tradition.

Take a drink when you see an ugly sweater or tie.

Finish your drink when it starts snowing on Christmas.

Finish your drink when the Christmas cynic is filled with holiday spirit.

Take a shot when the main charqacters fall in love.

Take a shot when you spot Candace Cameron Bure, Lacey Chabert, or Danica McKellar.

I recognize Bure and Chabert from Hallmark Movies and Mysteries, which take place in sleepy, small towns where there is a murder every other minute, LOL. It’s called the Cabot Cove effect. These small towns are Murder Central. There is sometimes bloodletting to go with your hot cocoa and mistletoe.

I even like Christmas horror movies such as “Dead End” and “Black Christmas”. A new one to me is “Anna and the Apocalypse”, which is a horror musical comedy. It sounds like ridiculous fun. Anna battle zombies during Christmastime. I like a good horror comedy, and this one promises to be one.

My favorite Christmas movies are “Die Hard”, “A Christmas Carol” (starring Alistair Sim), and “Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale”. “Rare Exports” is a recent movie, and it’s incredible. It’s Finnish, and it tells the “true” story of Santa, based on folklore. This isn’t a jolly old elf who goes “ho, ho, ho”. Far from it. I highly recommend it. It makes “best Christmas movie” lists every year.

Here is a list of Christmas movies I recommend. I watch some of them every year, but not all of course because there are only so many hours in the day.

Classics

  1. We’re No Angels
  2. The Bishop’s Wife
  3. Holiday Inn
  4. It’s a Wonderful Life
  5. A Christmas Carol (starring Alistair Sim)
  6. Miracle on 34th Street
  7. White Christmas

Animated

  1. A Charlie Brown Christmas
  2. How The Grinch Stole Christmas
  3. Rankin Bass movies like Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and Santa Claus Is Coming To Town

Horror

  1. Black Christmas
  2. Dead End
  3. Gremlins
  4. Anna and the Apocalypse
  5. Edward Scissorhands

Other Faves

  1. Die Hard
  2. Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale
  3. The Man Who Invented Christmas
  4. Home Alone
  5. A Christmas Story
  6. Elf
  7. Bad Santa
  8. Hallmark Christmas Movies – Take Your Pick!
  9. Love Actually
  10. Carol
  11. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
  12. Scrooged
  13. The Santa Claus
  14. The Ref
  15. Joyeux Noël
  16. The Muppet Christmas Carol

Although Christmas has come and gone, it’s not too late to enjoy a little more holiday cheer. I celebrate through Epiphany. That’s when the tree is supposed to come down, supposed being the operative word. Last year, we didn’t take down the tree until May. This year I hope it comes down before Valentine’s Day. LOL So drink a cup of hot cocoa, turn on your TV, and enjoy love and peace during the holiday season. Let’s hope 2021 gets off to a good start and stays that way.

———

Elizabeth Black writes in a wide variety of genres including erotica, erotic romance, horror, and dark fiction. She lives on the Massachusetts coast with her husband, son, and her two cats. Her LGBTQ paranormal erotic shifter romance novel “Full Moon Fever” is now available for purchase at Amazon and other book distributors. Her collection of erotic fairy tales, “Happily Ever After: Twisted Versions of Your Favorite Fairy Tales”, is also available at Amazon.

Web site: http://elizabethablack.blogspot.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elizabethablack

Twitter: http://twitter.com/ElizabethABlack

Amazon Author Page: https://www.amazon.com/author/elizabethblack

Newsletter: http://eepurl.com/b76GWD

 

 

It’s Time To Give Thanks

It’s Thanksgiving in the United States. This is the time of year Americans gorge on turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, green bean casserole, and pumpkin pie. It’s also the time of year we see family we haven’t seen in years or see seldom. While the Thanksgiving/Christmas season can be stressful, I don’t see it that way. What am I thankful for? Plenty!

  1. I don’t have to cook Thanksgiving dinner. My husband is a gourmet cook and he takes on the entire task. He makes the green bean casserole from scratch, including the cream of mushroom soup and crispy shallots that get mixed in with the dish. It’s much better than the Campbell’s version. He brines the turkey overnight and then roasts it Thanksgiving day. I preferred to buy a pumpkin pie so he’d have less work to do. My job is to stay out of his kitchen and keep him company while sitting in a chair nearby. I am eternally grateful that I don’t have to take on the Herculean task of cooking turkey dinner.
  2. eXtasy Books has accepted my gay werewolf paranormal erotic romance for publication. It’s entitled “Full Moon Fever”, and it’s coming out in 2020. My book is about two gay werewolves who work as gaffers (lighting) for a traveling stage show. They are looking for a third partner, and they have their sights set on the lead dancer. They’re also friends with two female scenic painters who give them a run for their money. I’m planning a sequel for this book. One of my werewolves has to deal with a person from his past – his ex. I haven’t thought further on the sequel, but it’s going to be a fun ride.
  3. We don’t have a lot of debt, unlike many people. I was told that the average credit card debt in America is appx. $5,000. I owe about $500 on two cards and I plan to pay it off within two weeks. I always pay the credit cards when the bill comes in so I don’t have to worry about interest. We owe money on a used VW Beetle (love that car), but otherwise we are debt free. We worked hard to get there.
  4. Although we’re up there in years, we are blessed with good health. I have my daily prescriptions to take and so does my husband but it’s manageable.
  5. I am close to my family. My son joined us for Turkey day. I called my dad and sister. We also called my stepson and his wife. They live out of state. We don’t see them often but when we do we have a wonderful time. I’m not sure when we’re venturing down to their homes again, but we do plan to visit in 2020.
  6. We aren’t hurting for money. The bills get paid each month and there’s some left over for fun stuff.
  7. We are owned by three cats. I’m glad the apartment complex allows pets. They got turkey and giblet on Thanksgiving just like us humans.
  8. We live in a New England beach resort. For Christmas, we get to see the tree in town lit up and Santa arrives on a lobster boat. Everyone in town (this is a small town) comes out for the lighting of the tree and we drink hot cocoa. Living here is like living in a Hallmark Christmas movie.

There’s plenty to be thankful for, and I figured it was a good time to remind myself of that fact. I hope Americans reading had a very happy Thanksgiving. Here’s looking to Christmas to continue the festive joy.

———

Elizabeth Black writes in a wide variety of genres including erotica, erotic romance, horror, and dark fiction. She lives on the Massachusetts coast with her husband, son, and her three cats. Her story “The Beautiful Move in Curves” appears in “Dangerous Curves Ahead”, an anthology of sexy stories about plus-sized women. Look for it at Amazon. Her new paranormal erotic shifter romance novel “Full Moon Fever” will be for sale in 2020.

 

Web site: http://elizabethablack.blogspot.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elizabethablack

Twitter: http://twitter.com/ElizabethABlack

Amazon Author Page: https://www.amazon.com/author/elizabethblack

Newsletter: http://eepurl.com/b76GWD

 

 

No Holiday Romance

[I am posting this on behalf of Jean Roberta, who is having computer problems. You can contact her at jean2551englishlit [at] yahoo [dot] ca ~ Lisabet]

By Jean Roberta

This is the season when I sometimes wish I had written more winter-holiday romances: stories about a man and a woman finding love in picturesque snowy landscapes (on a ski trip, lost in the woods, or under the city lights surrounded by decorated Yule trees) with little or no explicit sex. Stories like this get posted, published, and reposted a lot during this season. I was invited to send any of my holiday romance stories to be reprinted. Alas, none of my stories fit.

There is “Amanda and the Elf” (under 2K), a raunchy little piece in which Amanda, an exhausted divorced mother of two children, is visited on Christmas Eve by a studly elf she hasn’t seen since she was a horny teenager. (Hint: he is really a masturbation fantasy, small enough not to be threatening, but with superhuman ability to satisfy any woman who wants him.) Although the elf is likely to show up in Amanda’s life again, their relationship doesn’t exactly have a quality of “happily ever after.”

This story first appeared in Merry XXXmas, a holiday anthology edited by Alison Tyler (Cleis Press, 2005).

Then there is my historical story of clandestine lesbian love, “A Visit from the Man in Red.” One of the women has a child by an abusive ex-husband, as well as a set of parents who expect her to find and marry a better man as soon as possible. The year in 1968, when a sweeping Omnibus Bill modernized Canadian culture by legalizing sex between men and making divorce easier to get. The two women arrange their own secret Christmas celebration, and when the ex-husband threatens to ruin it, the day is saved by a man in a red uniform: a closeted gay “brother” in the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. Again, this is not really a romance.

The story was first published in Naughty or Nice? – another holiday anthology from Cleis, edited by Alison Tyler (2007). Then it appeared in my single-author collection of women’s erotica, The Princess and the Outlaw: Tales of the Torrid Past from Lethe Press in 2013.

Then there is “The Feast of the Epiphany,” a story with no explicit sex in which two women and two men go out for supper on “Ukrainian Christmas,” as it is called on the Canadian prairies:  January 6 or 7, when Christmas is celebrated in the Eastern Orthodox Catholic Church. The narrator, a divorced woman who is trying to find her way into the lesbian community, has a crush on the other woman, who seems strong, capable, and comfortable with her identity as a dyke.  The men are also mutually attracted, but one believes that monogamy is part of heteronormative oppression, and he has had a “friendship with benefits” with the supposed dyke. The other man feels strongly about the need for commitment; he was disowned from his Orthodox Jewish family for being gay, and doesn’t want to waste his love on someone who can’t be loyal. During a lively discussion, the waiter (who is also gay, of course) jumps in as a mediator. There is a fairly happy ending for all the characters, but is this “romance?” Maybe, but it’s not highly seasonal.

This story was accepted (somewhat to my surprise) for Coming Together: Into the Light, a more-or-less erotic anthology of stories about revelations, edited by Alessia Brio, published by Phaze Publications in 2010 as part of an erotic series that raises money for worthy causes. This volume won an EPPIE (Electronically Published Internet Connection) award.

When one mushy movie after another with “Christmas” in the title shows up on my TV screen, I sometimes wonder why I haven’t written a narrative like these. They look easy to write, and I seem to be capable of throwing characters together.

However, as I was told by one of my English profs many years ago, you can’t write a convincing plot about something you don’t believe in. This was his warning to those of us who might have the hubris to think we could make lots of money writing traditional romances for Harlequin in the U.S. or Mills and Boone in the U.K.

I have written about sexual relationships between men and women, and in some cases, I’m very fond of my characters and want them to be happy together. (My “bawdy novella, The Flight of the Black Swan, is set in the1860s, and features an official marriage which serves as cover for two same-gender love affairs.  This book is sexually classified as “bisexual.”)

In general, however, I don’t believe that the social, legal, and economic inequality between men and women which prevailed in Western society for centuries leads to True Love. I suppose I’m a feminist killjoy.  There have always been loopholes in the patriarchy, and women have made great strides in the last fifty years, but if you think male violence against females is fading into history, you are out of the loop. Every step forward made by women seems to be met by enormous resentment from men.

To throw a hero and a heroine together, I need them both to be exceptional, and I need their circumstances to be unusual. A sprig of mistletoe isn’t enough to persuade me that two people who have serious objections to each other (the “Dearest Enemy” romance trope that I’ve written about elsewhere) can suddenly fall in love, or recognize that love was there all along. The magic of the season doesn’t seem like an adequate reason why two people would want to spend their lives together. If it wouldn’t work in March or September, it wouldn’t work better in December.

I could refer you to several recent posts in social media about the unpaid “emotional labour” largely done by women, especially during the winter holidays, when gifts must be bought, feasts cooked, houses decorated, and social events planned. In real life, all this work doesn’t usually lead to melting glances between an exhausted woman and a typically clueless man who has no idea what she wants him to do.

In my own real life, I am living happily with my spouse, the woman I have been with since 1989. (Next summer, we plan to put on some sort of celebration for the thirtieth anniversary of our first overnight date.) We love this time of year because the break from paid work gives us a chance to become couch potatoes watching mushy movies together. Maybe I should write about that.

What Am I Thankful For?

Elizabeth Black writes in a wide variety of genres including erotica, erotic romance, horror, and dark fiction. She lives on the Massachusetts coast with her husband, son, and her two cats. Visit her web site, her Facebook page, and her Amazon Author Page. 

Her m/m erotic medical thriller Roughing It is a sexy cross between The X Files, The Andromeda Strain, and Outbreak. Read her short erotic story Babes in Begging For It, published by Cleis Press. You will also find her new novel No Restraint at Amazon. Enjoy a good, sexy read today.

___

Thursday, Nov. 23 was Thanksgiving in the United States. It’s a holiday dedicated to when the Native Americans and American colonists broke bread together. It’s a day of remembering what you are thankful for.

It’s also a day of massive, bloat-worthy Triptophan turkey dinners, insane political talk from Crazy Uncle Joe at the dinner table, greedy shopping binges, and kids flushing their underwear down the toilet so that you have to pay the exorbitant Holiday fee to have a plumber unclog it. It’s all about family get-togethers and good cheer in between two much pumpkin pie and copious amounts of cheap wine that loosens tongues.

I was hanging out on FARK, my favorite not-news social media aggregator, when I saw a post about “what are you thankful for today?” The comments included the usual snark like:

A couple hours ago my cat walked right up to my feet and immediately puked. I thanked her for missing my feet. But not the socks I left under my desk last night. Did make clean up easy.

My cat came up to me in bed and expressed displeasure of hosting 2 dogs by projectile vomiting on me. Intimacy, I am thankful for.

Health, familial stability, kindness and understanding. And all you assholes, I’m thankful y’all’re here too.

I have weed.

I woke up again today. That was good.

Living in a country where I can buy one of those enormous containers of Utz cheese balls.

Most comments were sincere though, and they reminded me of what I am thankful for.

I am thankful that I don’t have to cook Thanksgiving dinner. If you’re not American, have you ever seen a Thanksgiving dinner? There’s a picture of it next to the word “gluttony” in the dictionary.

I also have weed.

I have good health and a husband who loves me very much.

I know better than to talk about religion and especially politics at the dinner table today or any other day for that matter.

My son is doing well. He has a job he loves but he needs to find his own place. He’s working on that.

My husband is doing well. He’s retiring in about two years. He’s my soulmate. I don’t know what I’d do without him. 

My two blind cats. They love snuggles and petting and they keep me entertained.

I have the ability to write freely. I wish I were paid better but I have writing freedom lots of people don’t have. I also get support for my writing from my family which I understand lots of writers don’t have.

So on this Thanksgiving 2017, I wanted to write about what I was thankful for. I know I’m very fortunate, and I will not look a gift horse in the mouth. So now that the holiday season has started whether you live in or outside the U. S., get those lights lit and that tree up. Wrap those gifts. Enjoy the endless streams of Christmas music (or gouge your ears out with an ice pick, whichever applies). Seasonal affective disorder doesn’t start for me until January so I’m going to enjoy this good mood while I can. Happy holidays, everyone!

Holiday Special: Literary and Media Figures and Their Favorite Drinks

Elizabeth Black
writes in a wide variety of genres including erotica, erotic romance, horror,
and dark fiction. She lives on the Massachusetts coast with her husband, son,
and her three cats. Visit her web site, her Facebook
page, and her Amazon Author Page.
 

Her new m/m erotic medical thriller Roughing
It is out! This book is a sexy cross between The X Files, The Andromeda
Strain, and Outbreak. Read her short erotic story Babes in Begging For It, published by
Cleis Press. You will also find her new novel No
Restraint at Amazon. Enjoy a good, sexy read today.

For The Love Of God, Montresor!

Literary and Media Figures and Their Favorite
Drinks

Since ’tis the
season for festivities, I though it would be fun to not only write about famous
literary and media characters and their favorite drinks, but to include
recipes! During this holiday season, feel free to be like Phryne Fisher or
Ebenezer Scrooge and toss back one of their favorite cocktails. I found some of these cocktails at The Cocktail Chart of Film & Literature at Pop Chart Lab.

These first three
aren’t meant to be taken seriously, but they’re so amusing I had to include
them. I’m not encouraging you to throw cigarette ash or downers into your drinks,
but if you insist on doing that, at least be creative.

Moe Szyslak – The Simpsons

The Flaming Moe

Drops of various
liquors

Cigarette ash

Krusty Brand
non-narcotic cough syrup

Charlie Chaplin – The Adventurer

The Dregs

All leftover
cocktails in the bar poured into one glass.

Alex – A Clockwork Orange – Anthony Burgess

Alex and his cronies
downed this drink before engaging in some wholesome, clean ultraviolence where
they’d beat up strangers, rob stores, and the like. It’s nothing more than milk
and downers.

Moloko Plus

Milk and
barbiturates – Vellocet, Synthemese, and Drencrom

The following are
classics. I enjoy drinking Amontillado since I am a huge Poe fan. I could drink
this stuff and argue with writers as to who is better – Poe or Lovecraft? That
always ends up being a very heated discussion. When I went to the Stanley Hotel
Writers Retreat in October, 2015, I passed on drinking bourbon on the rocks
despite that being Jack Torrance’s favorite drink since I detest bourbon. That
said, I can’t let this article continue without mentioning those fine
beverages.

Montresor and Fortunato – The Cask Of
Amontillado – Edgar Allan Poe

Amontillado.

Jack Torrance – The Shining – Stephen King

Bourbon on the rocks

Harry Potter – Butterbeer – J. K. Rowling

Butterbeer is
generally thought of as non-alcoholic but there are boozy varieties of the
drink. There is even a Starbuck’s version. I’m here to give you both.

From Food52, the alcoholic version
includes ½ stick of unsalted butter, light and dark brown sugar, freshly grated
ginger, dark rum, ginger beer, and other ingredients. Go to the link for the
full recipe including ingredients and instructions on how to make it.

Here’s one of the many
versions of a grande butterbeer
for Starbuck’s
. Just save this blog post page on your iPhone and show it to
the barista who will make the drink for you. Please don’t do this when it’s
very busy because you may annoy the staff with a special order.

Ask
for a Creme Frappuccino base. Don’t skimp on the fat by asking for skim or 2%
milk as whole milk is required for the right consistency.

Add 3
pumps of caramel syrup.

Add 3
pumps of toffee nut syrup.

Top
with caramel drizzle.

Phryne Fisher – Miss Fisher’s Murder
Mysteries – Kerry Greenwood

I have enjoyed Benedictine
for many years, but I was sold when I discovered Phryne Fisher likes the
liqueur. My husband’s late father used to declare it on his taxes as medicine
and he got away with it. Maybe it’s because he lived in Europe. Ha! Kerry
Greenwood, who created Miss Fisher, talked about Phryne introducing herself in
the forward to her books.

Forward
from Kerry Greenwood
, about Phryne Fisher for the books Cocaine Blues,
Flying Too High
, and Murder On The Ballerat Train.

Thank you for buying this book. I have a wizard and three
cats to feed. Picture the scene. There I am, in 1988, thirty years old and
never been published, clutching a contract in a hot sweaty hand. I have been
trying for four long and frustrating years to attract a publisher and now a
divinity has offered me a two book conract about a detective in 1928. I am
reading the ads as the tram clacks down Brunswick Street. They are not
inspiring posters. I am beginning to panic. This is what I have striven for my
whole life. Am I now going to develop writer’s block? When I never have before?

Then she got onto the tram and sat near me. A lady with a
Lulu bob, feather earrings, a black cloth coat with an Astrakan collar and a
black cloche jammed down over her exquisite eyebrows. She wore delicate shoes
of sable glacé kid with a Louis heel. She moved with a fine louche grace, as
though she knew that the whole tram was staring at her and she both did not
mind and accepted their adulation as something she merited. She leaned towards
me. I smelt rice powder and Jicky. ‘Why not write about me?’ she breathed. And,
in a scent of Benedictine, she vanished. That was the Honourable Phryne Fisher.
I am delighted to be able to introduce you to her.

Ebenezer Scrooge –  A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens

I can’t let a
holiday article about cocktails go by without mentioning Mr. Scrooge. This
drink is served warm and it’s perfect for curling up in front of a roaring fire
and listening to Victorian Christmas carols with someone you love.

Smoking Bishop

¼ cup sugar

1 bottle red wine

Juice from several oranges

1 bottle port

Strain oranges

Prick oranges with
cloves

Let sit for 24 hours

Serve warm

Edgar Allan Poe – Eggnog

I must mention Poe
one more time, since he liked a classic holiday drink. Poe loved eggnog. He
even used in in his classic tale The Pit
And The Pendulum
. Poe’s West Point roommate recalled he also couldn’t be
found far from a bottle of Benny Haven’s best brandy. Benny Haven was Poe’s
favorite place to go to drink. The jury is still out as to whether or not he was
an alcoholic. Stories regarding the cause of his death range from rabies to
being beaten to death after refusing to be used in vote rigging. The eggnog was
a family recipe.

Eggnog

7
eggs, separated

1
cup sugar

5
cups whole milk, divided

1/2
cup heavy whipping cream

1
1/2 cups brandy

1/4
cup rum

Nutmeg

Combine
the egg yolks and sugar in a medium boll and whisk until thick and pale. Set
aside. Fill a large bowl with ice water and set aside. Warm 3 parts milk over
low heat. Whisk 1 cup of warm milk into the yolk mixture. Add this back to the
milk in the pan. Stir over low heat until combined and thickened. Remove from
heat and stir in the cream quickly. Place the saucepan in the ice water. Stir
until chilled then add the brandy, rum, and remaining milk. Pour eggnog into
glasses. Whip the egg whites into stiff peaks in a bowl and spoon over the
eggnog. Top with nutmeg. Merry Christmas!

Topper – Pink Lady

When I first watched
the movie Topper, I became very
interested in Pink Ladies since Marion Kerby swore by them. I have yet to try
one, but maybe this season I’ll give one a try.

1½ -2 oz. Gin

1 Egg White

1 teaspoon Grenadine

1 teaspoon Double
Cream

Fresh Strawberry for
garnish

Directions:

Combine the
ingredients with ice, shake vigorously. Strain into a glass. Garnish with ½
strawberry on a cocktail stick.

Variation:

White Lady:

2 oz. Gin

¾ oz. Each of
Cointreau and Lemon juice

1 Egg White (if
liked)

[Omit the grenadine
and cream]

Directions:

Combine the
ingredients with ice, shake vigorously. Strain into a glass. Garnish with ½
strawberry on a cocktail stick.

Carrie Bradshaw – Sex and the City – Candace
Bushnell

I am not a fan of Sex and the City for reasons I won’t go
into here, but I must give Carrie Bradshaw kudos for popularizing the Cosmo.

Cosmo

4 parts vodka

1 part Cointreau

2 parts lime juice

3 parts cranberry
juice

Shake and serve on
ice

John Steed and Mrs. Emma Peel – The Avengers

The reason my
favorite drink is champagne is due to it being the preferred beverage of Steed
and Mrs. Peel. It’s nearly all I drink aside of red wine, Benedictine, Campari,
and Amontillado. Those two drank it all the time, even when they were painting
Mrs. Peel’s flat. I recall they preferred Chateau Mouton Rothchild, but that’s
a bit out of my price range. I also like brut champagne. The drier the better.

FYI – Oscar Wilde
also preferred to drink iced champagne. At the time of his death, he was
drinking a combination of opium, chloral and champagne. He did say, “And
now I am dying beyond my means.”

Champagne

And now for the
hard-boiled characters. You don’t get much more hard-boiled than Raymond
Chandler. Chandler was as much of a double-fisted drinker as were his
creations. An alcoholic, he suffered blackouts and threatened suicide. He lost
a job due to drink and began writing at 44. When his wife died, he dived
further into the bottle. His alcoholism haunts his stories. He favored the gin
gimlet just like his character Philip Marlowe. Still, if you want to drink like
the heavies, go for it.

Vivian Sternwood Rutledge – The Big Sleep –
Raymond Chandler

Scotch Mist

2 to 3 ounces
scotch, bourbon, or brandy

½ cup crushed ice

lemon twist over
edge of glass

Philip Marlow – The Long Goodbye – Raymond
Chandler

Gin Gimlet

½ gin

½ Rose’s lime juice

And now for the disasters
amongst us. The Great Gatsby included drinking and excessive living. It was
mainly about the downfall of the American Dream in the 1920s. Fitzgerald
favored gin because he believed people couldn’t smell it on his breath. He ad
his wife Zelda were heavy gin drinkers. Another alcoholic writer, cocktails
figured prominently in his fiction. He preferred the gin rickey, just like his
character Jay Gatsby did.

Daisy Buchanan – The Great Gatsby – F. Scott
Fitzgerald

Mint Julep

2.5 ounces bourbon

2 sugar cubes

4 or 5 mint leaves

Serve over ice

Muddle

Jay Gatsby – The Great Gatsby – F. Scott
Fitzgerald

Gin Rickey

1 shot gin

½ shot fresh
squeezed lime juice

lime zest

2.5 ounces bourbon

Here’s to the rise
and fall of rugged masculinity from Hemingway and Williams. Although Hemingway
was fond of drinking, he did not do so while writing. Also, his favorite drink
was not the mojito. He was diabetic and couldn’t tolerate the sugar so it’s
unlikely he drank mojitos. He did drink absinthe and double daiquiris without
sugar. His favorite drink was the dry martini.

Jake Barnes – The Sun Also Rises – Ernest
Hemingway

Jack Rose

2 ounces applejack

1 ounce lemon or
lime juice

dash of grenadine

Tennessee Williams
suffered from severe anxiety and drank to ease the pain. He often spoke of his
love for downers saying that they enhanced and unblocked his creativity,
although his critics disagreed. Downers did him in in the end when he choked to
death on a bottle cap to his prescription barbies. Alcohol played an important
part in the lives of his characters as well, Brick Pollett being an excellent
example.

Brick Pollett – Cat On A Hot Tin Roof  – Tennessee Williams

Hot Toddy

2 tbsp bourbon

1 tbsp mild honey

2 tbsp fresh lemon
juice

¼ cup boiling hot
water

Stir and serve warm

I can’t talk about
rugged masculinity without mentioning Bond. James Bond. While most people
associate Bond with a martini, shaken, not stirred, it wasn’t the only thing he
drank. He enjoyed an Americano in Casino
Royale
. My husband and I are huge fans of Campari and vermouth. The
Americano is similar to a Negroni, but it uses Perrier instead of gin. We could
drink either one. To you, Mr. Bond!

James Bond  – Casino Royale – Ian Fleming

Americano

1 ounce Campari

1 ounce sweet red
vermouth

Perrier

Stir

You can’t go wrong
this holiday season with all these cocktails at your disposal to drink. Celebrate
Christmas and honor Phryne Fisher, Marion Kerby, and Scrooge with warmth and
nostalgia. Don’t forget to share with your friends. Happy Christmas to all, and
to all a good night!

Sexy Snippet Day for December

Greetings of the season to everyone reading this! I know you’re all busy with cards and gifts, shopping, baking and writing. But I do hope you’ll take some time off to enjoy Sexy Snippet Day!

This is your chance to share the hottest mini-excerpts you can find from your published work. 

The ERWA blog is not primarily intended for author promotion. However, we’ve decided we should give our author/members an occasional opportunity to expose themselves (so to speak) to the reading public. Hence, we have declared the 19th of every month at the Erotica Readers and Writers Association blog Sexy Snippet Day.

On Sexy Snippet day, any author can post a tiny excerpt (200 words or less) in a comment on the day’s post. Include the title from with the snippet was extracted, your name or pseudonym, and one buy link, if you’d like.

Please post excerpts only from published work (or work that is free for download), not works in progress. The goal, after all, is to titillate your readers and seduce them into buying your books!

Feel free to share this with erotic author friends. It’s an open invitation!

Of course I expect you to follow the rules. If your excerpt is more than 200 words or includes more than one link, I’ll remove your comment and prohibit you from participating in further Sexy Snippet days. I’ll say no more!

After you’ve posted your snippet, feel free to share the post as a whole to Facebook, Twitter, or wherever else you think your readers hang out.

Enjoy!

~ Lisabet

Hot Chilli Erotica

Hot Chilli Erotica

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