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Swingers

Controlling Jealousy

by | December 24, 2020 | , , , , | 2 Comments

Jealousy is probably one of the largest concerns when a new couple starts swinging beyond the is my dick or tits big enough. Being the amateur psychologist that I am, I enjoy psychoanalyzing others at a party.

We were lucky in that our initial forays into wife swapping was with a great group of people and that my wife was understanding of my lack of impulse control. Like most guys, I let my little buddy make all my decisions for me.

For a guy, going to a swinger’s party is like being locked in a Krispy Kreme with an empty stomach and a Keurig on automatic.

When a new couple shows up, it’s like throwing raw meat to the lions as everyone wants a taste. For a guy, it’s that moment when you realize that not only are you going to get laid, but your significant other is also a prime target.

The first few times at a House Party can be stressful as you may not know many people, and how you’re going to perform under pressure is a polite way of describing the situation. As a guy, performance anxiety is a common thing that rears its ugly head, unlike what you really want to raise. After all, she only has to lay there. 😊

Like most things, practice makes perfect, and you’ll quickly recover the woody when you discover that everyone is about the same as you. Swingers are like everyone else, just with fewer morals.

My recommendation is to try, and both of you get lucky at the same time. It’s hard to be jealous when you’re getting your ashes hauled at the same time as your wife is screaming out someone else’s name. This is why I recommend that you start with house parties and not couple-on-couple.

It would seem that two on two would be better for newbie couples, but I don’t think that’s the case. From personal experience, I’ve found that when you get together with another couple, the chances that everybody will hit it off are rare. You don’t want to start out getting your lights drilled out while your other half is staring at someone he/she has no interest in.

If you go to a party with, say, ten or fifteen other couples, the chances both of you score is much better. Plus, you don’t have to do what we call a “charity fuck.” As much as I hate to admit it, there is one woman in our circle that I use every excuse I can find not to get together with her.

She’s really nice, and Wifey enjoys the company of her husband, but she just doesn’t ring my bell. She gets mad at me for ducking her and gripes to my wife that I won’t fuck her. I realize that the worst I ever had was wonderful, and I can go to Hell for culling, but I’d actually rather do without.

New couples almost always makeup rules to corral the other half but in actuality, that rarely works out. If you tell your wife, “I don’t want to see you on your knees with a waiting line,” good luck with that.

If your spouse breaks a rule, take a breath, and don’t explode. They can get caught up in the heat of the moment and do something against the rules. In most cases, what you’ll figure out is that the rules slowly fade away as you become more comfortable in the Lifestyle.

Don’t argue in front of others. Wait until you’re alone to air your grievances. Most of the time, these little things will work themselves out. I’m sure you’d rather have her head banged against the headboard at a party rather than at a long lunch with a co-worker?

Seriously, the first few times are the toughest, and you have to realize that consensual sex with others is not love but lust. If you are a committed couple and in a stable relationship, the Lifestyle can be entertaining and a lot of fun. Swinging will not help a bad marriage but will only hasten its demise.

We were talking the other day about how much fun we’ve had since we started swinging. With COVID-19, there is little we can do beyond talking about it. A fair percentage of the women in the Lifestyle are exhibitionists, and the show at a party is worth the price of admission. It’s kind of like watching People of Walmart without having to click the Next button and dodge the ads.

It’s also interesting that bi-sexuality is common among women but rare with men, at least in our group. My wife plays for both teams and is bad about taking my current prospect off my hands, but at least I get to watch and have sloppy seconds.

We’ve talked a lot lately about cuckold husbands with their Hotwives at ERWA, and several of our friends are into that kink. In general, Lifestyle couples accept pretty much any form of aberrant behavior as long as it doesn’t stain your new shoes.

We have an us against them attitude with the normal people or “straights” as we call them. Straights wander around with their head in the clouds, completely oblivious to what’s going on around them. Occasionally, at 3 A.M., a group of us will run into a group of straights at Denny’s or IHOP, which usually results in the straights leaving in disgust at our behavior. There is nothing worse than telling a group of swingers that you find their attitude or dress code offensive. I’m sorry that my wife’s short skirt and open blouse offends you. Not!

It’s not as bad in Las Vegas as it was in the Midwest. People here usually just roll their eyes and return to reading the National Enquirer about aliens at Area 51. Once you get away from the Strip, it’s amazing how conservative the rank and file are, but they tend just to ignore us.

I’m Larry Archer, a smut writer, and this is my time of the month to spout off about completely useless topics of little relevance. If you are looking to entertain yourself with some hot stroke erotica with a humorous bent, check me out at LarryArcher.blog. I’m also on MeWe, the uncensored FaceBook like site at https://mewe.com/i/larryarcherauthor

Hotwives and cuckolds

by | October 24, 2020 | , , | 10 Comments

As a writer of erotic stories, I’ve often found that real life is sometimes harder to believe than fiction. Usually, I’ll experience something that gives me an idea for a story, and remembering a past experience is one such event.

When I lived in Houston, I ran around with a guy who lived in the same apartment complex. One night, over a beer, he said, “I had a weird experience the other night!”

“Really, what happened?” I asked.

“I walked into a neighborhood bar on Bellair, which was empty except for a couple sitting at a four-top. I sat down at the bar and ordered a beer.”

“After a few minutes, the woman got up and sat down beside me. She was hot and asked me to pass her the peanuts, which were on the opposite side from her. She pointed at the peanuts while bending over to give me a good shot of her boobs in a low cut top.”

“She tried to make conversation with me, but it freaked me out with her husband sitting at a table, not ten feet from me. She finally gave up and went back to her husband.”

“Then the bartender came over and whispered, ‘Don’t you like her?’”

“I replied, ‘Yeah, but not with her husband sitting there.’”

“The bartender chuckled and replied, ‘They come in here all the time, and she picks up a guy to take home with them.’”

My friend said that after thinking about it for a minute, he got up and asked the couple if he could join them. After a few minutes, the husband suggested that they go back to their house.

Going back to the couple’s residence, they had a drink, and then he ended up in bed with the wife while her husband sat in a chair by the bed and jerked off.

Initially, he was self-conscious about banging the guy’s wife, but after a few minutes, he completely forgot about her husband and had one of the best times of his life. Afterward, hubby invited him back anytime to take care of the wife.

At the time, I was a young single guy and would have never believed that married people would do such things. Fast forward a few years, and here I was married at a swinger’s party in bed with another guy’s wife.

Pam was a gorgeous older blonde MILF with a fabulous body that belonged to a much younger woman. Jack, her husband, had followed us into the bedroom and stood in the corner, watching.

When she noticed me looking at her husband, Pam asked, “He likes to watch. You don’t mind, do you?”

I said, “No,” because what else could you say in a situation like this?

She was insatiable, and one of the best lays I’ve ever had. The whole time Jack is whacking off watching us.

Towards the end, Foxy came in and climbed in bed with us. She often checks on me to be sure I’m doing okay. She kissed Pam, and I could see that Pam didn’t enjoy it as much as my wife did. Pam said that she’d never been with many women before but figured out if she wanted me, then she’d have to play ball.

It turned out that Pam and Jack lived a few minutes away from us, and we became good friends. In addition to screwing, we did bar hopping, dining, movies, and strip clubs together. Where we lived in the Midwest, strip clubs were typically in a less than attractive part of town. Jack was a cop and could legally carry a gun, so there were additional benefits to running around with them.

When I started writing porn, I have often included them in my erotic stories. I named the fictitious couple Pam and Jack in their honor. Hotwives and their cuckold husbands can be found at most swinger’s parties.

Pam has come over to the dark side and enjoys women as much as my wife does, but she still likes dick better. Jack is happy to hide in the closet to watch his wife get her lights drilled out and makes no bones about enjoying it.

A lot of my stories are based upon our experiences with Hotwives and their cuckold husbands. Hotwives are a popular theme in erotic literature, and it’s always fun to write about them.

I’m Larry Archer, and I love to write those stained and stuck together stories you read in the privacy of your locked bedroom or bath. My stroke erotica with somewhat of a plot thrown in is based upon our adventures in wife swapping. Join me on the twenty-fourth of every month to update our struggle to remain sane in this pandemic. For more perverted stuff, check out my blog, LarryArcher.blog, for more of the same. You can find my stories at Amazon, SmashWords, Apple iBooks, and many others for your reading pleasure. Remember, if you need some strange stuff, try your left hand!

Stay Safe! Love Foxy and Larry

Women as the Sexual Aggressor

by | September 24, 2020 | , , | 1 Comment

Spit or Swallow?

Generally speaking, males are raised with the belief that you should spread your seed far and wide. Women, on the other hand, are taught to keep their knees together and avoid being thought a slut.

The United States was initially founded in part by the desire for religious freedom, but we could not escape the effects of morality imposed upon us by the church. As a fallen Episcopalian and one-time altar boy, I’ve certainly been guilty of that.

In high school, the preacher’s daughter was typically the wildest girl in school. Proving the point that repression breeds a backlash in the opposite direction. You only have to look at prohibition, which resulted in organized crime.

As a typical horny youth, I was always trying to get “it,” but the girls were determined to keep me at arm’s length. As such, I considered myself as the aggressor in the never-ending battle to propagate the world.

When we got into the Lifestyle (a.k.a. Swinging), our initial encounters were with small groups, and then we joined a large association of like-minded individuals. I think we’d been partying for about three months before we went to our first social.

The social, held at a hotel, was attended by two or three hundred couples. There would be so many people that they could reserve entire floors or, in some cases, the whole hotel. When we had the hotel to ourselves, it was easier to avoid interactions with straights. “Straights” are those who have no idea what is going on around them.

Foxy and I are seated at this 8-top table for supper. Everyone was well dressed, most of the men were in suits, and the wives vied for the one who could show the most skin while spending the most for their outfits.

I have to admit that I was somewhat nervous as I knew no one we were sitting with. My wife, who has never met a stranger, and has no such problem. As my mother always says, “She’d talk to a fence post.”

Directly across from me was an Italian woman, mid to late thirties, beautiful with dark hair and olive complexion. We’d said nothing beyond introductions. At the end of dinner, everyone was having a drink and casual conversation, when the woman looked at me and said, “I’m going to crawl under the table and suck your cock!”

That sentence was the longest string of words she’d ever said to me and was like an ice pick to my brain. I was dumbfounded and had no idea what to do except listen to everyone laugh. She folded her napkin and laid it on the table, then proceeded to drop down and give me one of the best blowjobs of my life!

I can’t speak for others, but performing in a crowd seems to befall all of us males. Getting head while you’re sitting at a table with others talking around you was bizarre beyond belief. My Italian princess took care of business and didn’t get anything on my pants. The first time people watched me get sucked off at the dinner table was a memory I’ll never forget.

Afterward, she crawled out from under the table and dabbed at the corners of her mouth with a napkin. She winked at me and then kissed the woman sitting next to her. When she resumed conversation with everyone was another forever moment.

That was my initiation into the fact that women swingers are different from normal people. At a straight party, the guys hit on the girls, but at a swing function, they are free to hit on us in return. For a guy, it was an adjustment for women to be the aggressor.

This taught me to appreciate what women go through when they are frequently being hit on and having to fight us horn dog men off.

I’m Larry Archer, and I write smut stories for the huddled masses. I don’t write erotic romance, just explicit tales of people getting laid but with a plot. Well, somewhat of a plot! If you’re interested, follow my blog at LarryArcher.blog or to look at my catalog of stories, click this link. You’ll find me on Amazon, SmashWords, Apple iBooks, B&N, and under the counter of your local 7-11.

See you next month, stay safe!

The Good Old Days

by | August 24, 2020 | , | 2 Comments

With COVID-19 hampering everyone’s social life, there seems to be a lot of reminiscing going on. I was reading a news article on Headonism II in Jamacia, which sparked a series of thoughts about the good old days and the fun we used to have before the pandemic.

The last few months have been painful for ourselves and our friends as we try to stay safe. Swingers are a very social lot, and it is a drastic change to avoid parties and get-togethers. In comparison, we’ve both enjoyed living in Las Vegas, a.k.a. Sin City, still it is a significant change from life back in the mid-west.

In some respects, there is not as much to do here as there was back home. Las Vegas Boulevard or “The Strip” is where all of the tourists congregate to gamble, attend shows, drink, and party. Of course, their definition of “party” is different from ours.

Las Vegas has a number of public on-premise party houses, where you show up to a house and party. Here they are basically commercial operations started by couples in the Lifestyle who monetize house parties.

As anyone who’s thrown a party knows, it’s a lot of work and can often be hard on your home and furniture, especially when you have little control over who walks in the door. A couple will decide to start charging a fee to attend as a way of offsetting the expense and aggravation of holding a house party in their home.

There are maybe a half dozen or so places that have house parties regularly in Vegas, but for the most part, we usually avoid them. Once you’re in the Lifestyle for a while and meet other couples, there are always a few who have regular parties. These “house parties” typically have the same people attend, and there are rarely any issues.

Swingers, for the most part, do not drink, and as such, you don’t have drunks to contend with. The ones who cause issues are often new couples that have problems fitting into the activities. There is sometimes an adjustment period for newbies when you discover your other half with someone new.

For us, we’ll generally hit a party with ten to twenty couples given at someone’s house. If the planners do a good job, they will review the guest list to ensure that the attendees get along. Typically, most people are in the same socioeconomic class and share common interests.

Back home, we had a much wider variety of things to do. There were only a handful of people who threw parties regularly, but we also had nudist camps, strip clubs, and it seemed there was often a convention or large gathering of like-minded people.

While Las Vegas is known for its strip clubs but once again, entrepreneurs screwed it up. Back home, our strip clubs were more like a neighborhood bar where the employees take their clothes off. Here the dancers have an ATM with a time clock attached to their waist to keep track of you making it rain.

Previously, a group of ten couples would hit our favorite clubs a couple of times a month. Some of the clubs have couples nights with male dancers for the girls. The atmosphere is low key, and there is not a lot of pressure to separate you from your money.

It’s always seemed odd to me that once you get away from the Las Vegas Strip, the town is very conservative. Back home, we didn’t have the nightlife around the Strip, but in general, the area would be more liberal.

In Vegas, the weather outside is daunting during the summer, which limits outdoor activities. I think today it was 114 degrees F and pretty brutal. We don’t have much in the way of trees, so being outside is somewhat painful during the day.

My wife enjoys lying out at the pool and working on her tan, but here it has to be under the patio to minimize the intensity of the sun’s burning rays. Most homes have high block walls around the backyard, which are helpful to avoid the peeping Toms next door.

While we would occasionally visit a nudist camp, it was not on our regular schedule. Foxy doesn’t like bugs, and I grew up on a farm, so neither of us missed communing with nature au natural. Some of the couples we know are regular attendees, and one club even had small cabins that people built and would go all the time. For us, camping out was always at the Holiday Inn.

Our previous city has a big swinger’s club that has been in operation since the 1970s, and we were lucky to be introduced into the club by one of the first couples we met. They hold large parties, called socials, three or four times a year with sometimes up to two hundred couples attending.

Then there are always the smaller house parties, which are several times a month. We started having an annual New Year’s Eve Pajama Party at our house with fifty to sixty couples. That was always fun but exhausting. Giving a party is a lot of work, especially for two anal people like my wife and me.

Previously, I owned my own business before moving to Sin City, and as such, my time was a lot freer than now when I have to work for a living! We traveled a lot, and our PJ Parties often had five to ten couples from out of state that we had met at clubs across the country. This meant that our Pajama Party would last for up to three or four days, depending on when New Year’s Day fell. People would start showing up at our house a couple of days before the party, and it would last until the next workday.

I’m not sure why I’m thinking about the good old days, except that now it’s stay at home and FaceTime people for excitement. Eventually, we will have a vaccine, and life will return to something resembling normal. I’m not convinced that a Zoom swinger’s party will be like the real thing!

As Las Vegas is a tourist destination, COVID-19 has hit our economy pretty hard. I’m lucky in that my job is not in the entertainment business, and I think I’m relatively safe from getting laid off, but a lot of people are not that lucky.

I’ve noticed several homes in my subdivision that have been abandoned in the last couple of months, and even in a gated community, there is heightened anxiety about security concerns. But we all need to do what we can to ride this out and stay safe.

As a writer of erotica, I’ve ignored the virus in my writing as I feel people need an escape from the day to day problems and just forge ahead as if nothing is wrong. If you need some explicit HEA sex stories to pound your pud, check me out at LarryArcher.blog/stories.

Stay safely six feet apart and wear your mask! See you next month.

XOXO,

Foxy & Larry

Writing – Craft, Science, or Magic

by | July 24, 2020 | , , | 2 Comments

A mechanic has his impact wrench and a carpenter his hammer, but what tools does a writer use to accomplish his trade? We used to say a typewriter, such as a Royal or Underwood, but today’s writer likely uses a laptop or desktop to ply his/her craft.

I’ve been in the business of writing stories for going on eight years now without the benefit of formal training on the art of stringing words together in a coherent fashion. As a typical engineer, I’ve approached the English language in the same manner as you would a murder hornet. I honestly believe that engineers as a species are born with a genetic defect that renders us incapable of understanding the English language and manipulating it for our own good.

Born during the dawn of computers, the one thing that always sat on my desk was a dictionary or Word Catalog as my friend Maurice always called it. He loved to read the dictionary, but he always complained that the topics kept changing.

Later on, we had a speller to replace the dictionary as we knew what word we wanted to use but were unable to spell it. The “speller” is known under a variety of titles and can only be found these days as a used book. It contains only a list of words without definitions to minimize the size of the book.

My latest copy of Webster’s NewWorld Speller/Divider still sits on my desk as it’s often easier to look up a word that you can’t spell and can’t get close enough for the builtin spell checker program to guess. For instance, nymphomanic is a common word that I get wrong about half the time, or areola is another one I struggle with.

I live in awe of my esteemed colleges when they discuss sentence structure or parsing a sentence. My mouth hangs open at the thought of when to use a noun or adverb, or what that even means? As I always say, “I thought Viagra was used to cure a dangling participle.”

I grew up in what is called “Deep East Texas,” in piney woods country. I usually spent the summers with my grandparents on their reasonably large farm, hunting and exploring the endless woods around their house.

The one thing I learned from growing up in the Texas backwoods, besides the fact grass burrs hurt and being barefoot in a yard with chickens is no fun, was reading. My grandparents had a number of children, and for whatever reason, all of their college textbooks were stored at their home.

Consequently, when it was too hot to play outside, I would grab a textbook and read. That may have been what pointed my path to engineering was the reading of technical books as a child. As an only child, I learned to entertain myself, and my only friend during the summer was Blue, my grandpa’s blue tick hound.

I went to a well respected technical college, which no one has ever heard of outside of academics because we didn’t have a football team. Beyond the required English classes and one semester of technical writing, I had little experience with the English language. To this day, I consider English as a second language.

After a few years as a bachelor in Houston, I took a job in the Midwest, where I met my future bride. I’m not exactly sure how we ended up as swingers beyond the fact we both enjoyed experimenting and were not overly jealous of each other. From others in the Lifestyle, a lot of couples become involved after boredom starts to settle in. For us, it was an adventure where you got to see people naked and having sex without worrying about being arrested for peeping in your neighbor’s window.

The primary drawback to swinging is that you can’t talk about your experiences outside of your peer group. It’s not a topic that comes up around the coffee pot in the breakroom. LGBTQ folks used to be in the same category, but now it seems that we’re still the only ones still in the closet.

Fast forward to one day while reading Penthouse Forum letters that it dawned on me, “I can do this.” If I create a fictitious couple, then I can write about their wife swapping stories, and remain anonymous.

Now over thirty novels and novellas later, Foxy and Larry are the sex-crazed result of my fevered brain!

We were lucky to have surrounded ourselves with a diverse group of perverts to draw from, and there is no lack of story ideas to inspire the next tale. I tend to write somewhat “true” stories and will typically take something that we’ve seen or done and twist it into a stroke story.

We’ve been lucky in the fact that for most of our married life I was a reasonably successful business owner, which gives us a lot of free time. With a private plane, we travel the continental US to visit friends and clubs all over. Swingers are a diverse and exciting group of people and a never-ending source of ideas.

Supposedly the “Dirty Thirty” is a turning point in the career of an erotic writer. Once you have thirty books under your belt, then life gets better, or so they tell me. While I have no idea if that’s true, I have found that the ups and downs of my book sales are starting to flatten out to a relative level rate of sales.

My latest thought is to work on improving my craft, and to this end, I signed up for James Patterson’s Masterclass on writing. I’m partway through the course and have found it interesting, but so far, nothing earth-shattering beyond the fact he makes a hundred million a year, and I don’t.

I started the class as a cynic and so far have not been proven wrong. Like most “How to” books, there are certain basic things you must do to succeed. The first thing is obviously to do something. I am amazed at the number of people who say something like, “I’m going to write my first novel, then within two weeks, I’ll be able to buy my private island and retire.” Then a couple of months later, they disappear and you never hear from them again.

It doesn’t make a difference what you are trying to learn; it doesn’t happen overnight with the possible exception of being shot out of a canon! Having a piece of cardboard does not make you a breakdancer; only practice does.

“I didn’t know this was so hard?” is the first comment uttered by the next Stephen King. If it were that easy, everyone would be a writer!

The nice thing about self-publishing is that you don’t have to lick the boots of the editor. Anyone can publish their drivel, but will people buy it? The one thing Patterson said, along with Stephen King, is that no one bought their first book. You have to be able to accept rejection.

Patterson had over thirty rejection letters after submitting his first story. Stephen King offered the same advice in On Writing, which I highly recommend. Writers must be like the little engine who could, “I’ll never give up, I’ll never give up!”

Be leary of accepting advice from others unless they have the same mindset as you do. Certainly, when someone tells you that you need a comma somewhere, that is a solid piece of advice to heed. However, if it is, “I would have written that paragraph completely differently,” take that advice with a grain of salt.

No two writers will approach a story in the same way, and you need to develop your own unique style. Read the works of authors you consider your contemporaries or those you look up to. Don’t copy, but learn to emulate their style. When someone sells and is ranked higher on the lists, then they are doing something right. Your brother-in-law, who has never sold one of his writings, is not the person to learn from.

Pick wisely and use the advice that makes sense to you, then reject the rest. Above all, keep writing. Patterson recommends that you pick a time when you can write for an hour or two and do that every day. If it means getting up a five a.m. to have some alone time, you should do that.

I believe this but am not hardcore about it. What I’ve found is that if I don’t feel like writing, then forcing myself to write will result in crap. As an author, you must become disciplined about writing, but that’s not an absolute.

What I do is carry a laptop with me virtually 24×7 and have all my stories in the cloud. This way, if I’ve got a few minutes of downtime, I can fire it up and pound away. Now, if I don’t feel productive, then I open a story I’m working on and start reading it. When you open a story that you haven’t seen in a week or so, you will be surprised at the number of mistakes you’ve glossed over. We all tend to see what we want to see and not necessarily what’s actually on the paper.

The big thing that I’ve learned so far from James Patterson is persistence besides the fact he is a multimillionaire. To succeed, you need to try and continue to work until you make it. As a teenager, my father believed that if he could do something, then I could do it. When I said, “I can’t!” my father would say, “You can’t hardly.”

When you hit the wall, take two steps back, and hit the wall harder. My parents are a strange couple, my Dad is a blue-collar construction worker, and my Mom is a psychologist. Together they taught me that nothing is impossible if you want it bad enough. From my Dad, I learned never give up, and from Mom, intelligence will show you the way.

So if there is a story buried in your keyboard, it’s time to fish or cut bait. As Master Yoda says, “There is no try. Either do or do not!”

Well, I think I’ve about run out of paper for this month and will be back with you next month assuming COVID-19 or an angry husband doesn’t get me!

I’m Larry Archer, and I write explicit stroke stories. I don’t write mamby pamby erotica; it’s all about fucking and sucking! There is no other way to dress it up, like putting lipstick on a pig. I’m your guy when it’s time to lock the bathroom door and take care of business. Check out my blog https://LarryArcher.blog

Discovering Your Parents Are Swingers

by | June 24, 2020 | | 4 Comments

A couple we know is settling their parent’s estate and disposing of all the belongings after his parents passed away. Lewis and Jenny were going through boxes of miscellaneous junk until they discovered something they never expected.

Lewis called me and said, “My parents were swingers!”

“How did you figure that out?” I asked.

“One of their boxes contained a number of swinger’s magazines from the old days when swingers hooked up by mail rather than the Internet,” Lewis replied. “They made notes in margins of the magazines and rated some of the couples looking to party.”

We all got a big laugh at the discovery of his parents doing the nasty with others. Now that it’s okay to be LGBTQ, swingers are the final frontier, but I’m not sure that it’ll be socially acceptable to swap partners for a while.

Foxy and I have two separate lives as most swingers. We have our “straight” friends and our “party” friends, which hopefully will never meet. But we have a questionable track record so far.

Some of our close Lifestyle couples have met our relatives and vice versa. But everyone understands that certain aspects of our lives are off-limits to our relatives. Several times, we’ve (I’ve) screwed up.

As a semiprofessional photographer, I’m always shooting pictures and videos to document our life. I teach model photography, and a significant portion of my photographs are of models that I work with in a straight setting.

I have a studio at home with a wall displaying photos that I’ve taken. One day, my sister-in-law was looking over the pictures and discovered a nude of my favorite Hotwife.

To be honest, I’d forgotten the picture was up on the wall. But my sis in law focused on the woman out of all the others on display. The woman I call Pam is the fictitious Hotwife cuckold couple in my stories and mirror the real Pam and Jack.

Pam is a beautiful blonde, heading into MILF or Cougar territory, with nice boobs and a slender body. She was nude in the shot as our pool is clothes optional, but it was a tasteful photo with only her jugs on display.

“Wait a minute?” my sister-in-law asked. “Isn’t that, Pam?”

This was a reminder of my relatives knowing our swinger friends was not a good idea. Luckily, my sister-in-law hasn’t brought it up again, but I’m sure she’s wondering why I have naked pictures of my friend’s wife?

Speaking of pictures, I have several poster size shots of Foxy in the bedroom. Most are tasteful nudes, but a couple is with her and Chrissy, our girlfriend. I’ve got everything set up to swap out the photos for less controversial ones in case company is expected. I fear that one day, I’ll forget to switch out the pictures and get caught by one of our relatives.

While the nudes would cause an issue, the ones of her kissing another girl might push the limits.

Occasionally, we’ll run into another couple who we vaguely remember at a bar or restaurant. Then it’s a dance until we figure out, do they or don’t they? Often you can figure out if they swing or not by their attitudes or clothes. A woman who wears an ankle bracelet is supposed to be a swinger but don’t always take that symbol as gospel.

Depending on a couple’s involvement in the Lifestyle, some may actively hunt for other couples or rely on meeting by chance. Foxy and I belong to a large group of like-minded couples and don’t make it a goal to meet new people every day. We travel a lot (last few months excepted) and know many couples across the country.

Most large cities have one or more organized swinger’s organizations, and it’s interesting to attend a social to meet up with old friends and meet new ones. We treat parties as more of a social function than a sexual one, so our goals may be different than other couples.

A ”Social” as we call it is periodic meetings of couples, typically at bars or nightclubs, hosted by a local swinger’s organization. In many cases, these are low-pressure events and are good to get to know people. Swingers, like normal people, fall into several categories. We know some people where it’s take your clothes off at the door and get into a pile. Others appear to be a regular cocktail party except that people will disappear for an hour at a time.

Once you determine the crowd you are more comfortable in, just go to those types of parties. Swinger’s parties are never dull and always fun to attend. Generally speaking, there is little or no drinking, and so an asshole drunk is a rarity.

As usual, my column has drifted all over the place, similar to my mind. Stay safe and stay home for your parents, family, and friends.

Check out my blog and stroke stories at https://LarryArcher.blog. See you next month!

Non-Traditional Writing or The Meaning of Life

by | January 24, 2020 | | 6 Comments

Recently a thought struck me that I guess has been buzzing around in my head for years, but I’ve consciously or subconsciously been ignoring it. I don’t think I write traditional books as my stories are more a slice of life rather than something with a beginning, middle, and end.

When I say a slice of life, my stories tend to be a day in the life of Foxy and Larry, the fictional pervert couple in my books. Just as an average person gets up in the morning, goes to work, comes home, and goes to bed, my stories tend to be that way.

I’ve always struggled with two words, “The End,” which elude me most of the time when I’m writing.

I started writing to give myself the ability to talk about fictionalized versions of our adventures in the world of wife swapping or swinging, also known as throwing your house keys in a bowl.

So far, most of my stories have ended up with a vague ending as I never really had a final chapter in the story but more of, “I’ve got an idea for a new story, so somehow I’ve got to kick this one out the door!”

One of my latest WIP’s is House Party 2, which is an effort to correct the problems I created in the original House Party. In HP, my fictional wife runs off to LA and becomes a porn star. Now in HP2, I’m struggling to be a marriage counselor and patch things up. The original was 85,000 words, and the sequel will likely approach 90,000 words, which is way too long for a smut story, but I just can’t seem to quit.

HP2 is my first serious attempt to write something with Scrivener, the word processor for writers. I’ve pretty much figured it out except for the output process, which I haven’t really looked at yet. Scrivener allows you to break up your story in blocks such as chapters.

Rather that one long file, the story can be broken up into sections (chapters), and the writer only deals with that section at any time. For me, it works well as I get tired/bored working on a scene and can instantly jump to another chapter for something new.

One of my faults is that I’m easily distracted by a shiny object or a short skirt and have problems keeping my focus on the job at hand or possibly in my hand. I guess to be a writer, you should have a vivid imagination, which I seem to be guilty of but have absolutely no control over.

There was a moment of sadness and reflection when I learned of the passing of Terry Jones, one of the key people behind the silliness of Monty Python. I first became aware of the British comedy series of Monty Python and Benny Hill back when we lived in the mid-west. Our public television station would run shows from these two series during fundraising weeks.

The British people have a wonderful sense of offbeat humor and a weird fascination with spanking but to each, his own. Every time I see Spam in the grocery store, I think of those crazy people and wish we could return to a simpler time where our biggest problem was determining the airspeed velocity of an African swallow and what is the best way to tie a migratory coconut to it. At least we learned how to determine if someone is a witch or not. That would have made things a lot simpler for the Pilgrims in Salem. Watch out for the Killer Rabbit!

Once again thank you for struggling to the end of this post without resorting to beer, and as always if you’re in the bathroom with nothing to do, grab one of my stories: https://LarryArcher.blog/stories

XOXO Foxy and Larry

Keeping my eye on the ball

by | September 24, 2019 | | 2 Comments

There is no way around it, I suck at finishing stories. Over the last several months, I’ve written over one-hundred thousand words yet haven’t published a darn thing. There should have been two or three smut stories that I could have pulled off my computer, but nada.

By the same token, I’ve had to tape additional paper on the bottom of my sales chart to hold the line that is pointing towards the floor, when it should be pointing to the ceiling. With SmashWords, my sales are relatively stable, but Amazon is another story.

Amazon’s 30-day cliff means that a month after releasing a story, the door to the basement opens and your rating gets kicked down the stairs. So in a perfect world, I’d be publishing at least every month to maintain my author’s rank, but no, I can’t seem to accomplish that no matter how hard I try.

I’m so easily distracted by shiny objects even when I know that I should keep my eye on the ball and finish what’s in front of me. Unlike most other writers, I’ve had little training on how to write beyond a Technical Report Writing course I took in college.

My story ideas come to me out of the blue, often when I see something that sparks a train of thought to begin in my mind. Too often, what I find is that these flashes of inspiration will come as I’m typing madly away on some story.

My latest saga started when I finished House Party, where Foxy ran off with a movie producer to Los Angeles. This story is the first one where Foxy and Larry had a less than optimal outcome to a story. Assuming you’ve never read one of my stories from the Foxy and Larry series, they are a fictional version of ourselves. I started writing porn to give me the opportunity to talk about some of our adventures in swinging.

What I discovered is that I really enjoyed writing smut stories but quickly realized that I should have picked different names for my two main characters, but that’s water over the bridge. Not being a trained writer, the last almost seven years have been on the job training, so hopefully, I’ve grown.

For us being in the Lifestyle has always been fun and never something we fought about. This has always been reflected in my stories, yet I know that stories should have conflict, which I tried to inject in House Party with Foxy running off with another man. The bitch!

As I write House Party 2, I’m attempting to rectify the heroine running off and bring her back home. As I approached 50,000 words, I got the bright idea of what could happen if two sexually unsatisfied co-workers decided to solve their problems by swinging, while their hubbies watched Monday Night Football.

Now, this new story is approaching 45,000 words and is actually more complete than my first story, House Party 2. At this point, I have two stories that are each about 90% finished when wouldn’t you know I watched a German Goo Girls (GGG) movie on my computer. If you’re not familiar with Goo Girl movies, they are an offshoot of Japanese Bukkake, which are girls getting their faces covered with jizz and often don’t have sex, depending on your definition of what sex is?

In Goo Girls, they have sex then get their faces painted, so it’s the best of both worlds! That got me thinking about the ending of Crashing the Swinger’s Pajama Party, where Foxy sells a neighbor’s wife to a Goo Girls movie producer for ten thousand dollars, and she’s required to star in his shows for six months.

After releasing that story, I’ve had several fans write to ask when I’m going to cover Samantha’s adventures in the German Goo Girl movie business. Now I’m trying to flesh out my thoughts on the story before forgetting my train of thought.

Now I have three stories under active status, yet nothing is going out the door. Hopefully, I can focus long enough to finish something without another thought hitting me. The way my typical storyboarding process works is that I’ll get an idea, then let the characters start working the scenes in my mind.

My initial thought is to write down enough about a potential story that I can pick up the story at a later date and finish it. What often happens to me is that as I write up my notes on the new story, I become more interested in it and shift my attention to the new story.

That wouldn’t be too bad except that my imagination doesn’t stop working, and I’m continually coming up with story ideas, which just repeats the problem. It would be sweet if I could focus on one story and finish it before starting a new story.

My draft folder is full of stories that are half to three-quarters finished as I keep getting off track. Maybe one day, but what the hell!

For more from the irrelevant mind of Larry Archer, check out my blog at https://LarryArcher.blog Until this time next month, I’m off like a prom dress.

Why We Enjoy Swinging?

by | August 24, 2019 | | 6 Comments

F*** and B**

By Larry Archer

Why do we enjoy the Lifestyle is an interesting question that occasionally we get asked? Occasionally is because there are not a lot of reasons for it to come up. Similar to being gay or trans, swinging is not a topic that you bring up with your straight friends.

Generally speaking, I believe most straights assume that we spend all our time in bed with somebody else’s husband or wife. While that may be true to somewhat of a degree, the Lifestyle is a lot more than fucking and sucking.

When you are with other couples, the atmosphere is a lot more relaxed and stressfree. You don’t have to worry about your other half playing grabass with someone else after a few drinks. While there is a fair possibility that it may, in fact, happen, it doesn’t mean a problem. Just pull up a chair and enjoy the view or take care of someone else.

Certainly, there is an initial adjustment period for most couples, and some will bail initially as they can’t come to grips with their spouse sleeping with another. It’s natural to have some jealousy when your wife is getting her brains fucked out, but it’s funny how quickly that passes.

We always tell new couples to try and keep it even as it’s hard to be upset when you’re getting your bell also rang at the same time your wife is getting off. So if one of you is partying, then hopefully the other is also. The point to keep in mind is that this is simply sex and nothing else. Swinging is not cheating, and there is no love involved.

You are not slipping off for a nooner at Motel 6 or tipping the gardeners with a gangbang. Plus the neat thing is you can tell your other half all about it. If you cheat with that hot MILF in accounting, who are you going to tell about the blowjob you got in the storeroom, certainly not your wife?

It might seem strange at first, but getting sloppy seconds from your wife while she’s telling you exactly what she just did to some other guy or girl is so neat. A lot of guys enjoy watching their wife with other men, and being in the Lifestyle allows you to do that without worrying about what could happen.

New couples may think it’s better to start with another couple, but I think larger parties are a better choice. With only one other couple, you may have to take one for the team or a “charity fuck” as we call them. You can certainly say no, but you may feel somewhat forced to get with the other person as you’ll both be in the living room looking at each other while your other half is getting his lights drilled out.

At a house party, you are free to pick a different partner or not do anything if you desire. Just because your husband is with someone’s wife, doesn’t mean that you have to go with her husband. When your choices are greater, it’s more likely that you’ll find someone you like.

Sometimes, the wife is the ticket for the husband to get in the door, and people will quickly pick up on the fact, she never parties. This will typically mean that invitations for the next party will quickly dry up. Swinging is an event for both parties, and if you both don’t want to do it, maybe you should take up bowling.

If a cuckold – Hotwife couple are not swingers, they end up having to pick up random guys at a bar or possibly at work. This can be fraught with potential problems. If she goes off with a person or couple at a party, everyone knows where their partner is, and you don’t have to worry about them getting raped or attacked.

Certainly, couples can make this work, but for new couples, be careful. One couple we know had just flown in from somewhere and decided to get a drink at the airport bar. The wife ended up taking a hockey team back to the motel for a gangbang. Her husband said that it was incredible watching his wife take on the whole team.

Straight guys tend to freak out if the husband asks if he can watch! One of our best friends is a Hotwife, and she’d been taking care of guys before they started swinging. Her husband would sometimes be frustrated as he couldn’t find a place to hide and watch from. He had to be satisfied with her giving him a blow by blow detailed story afterward.

Now he can stand by the bed and jerk off or hide in the closet and peek out without anyone thinking he’s weird. With us, he likes to video his wife so he can enjoy it over and over. She’s a blonde MILF with an awesome body, and she often goes out with my wife and I. They are both exhibitionists and enjoy flirting and showing off to strange guys and girls.

We have a Corvette convertible with only two seats, so one has to sit in the other’s lap which always generates interesting comments from passersby. She was initially not very BI but was quickly converted by my wife, who’s more into girls than guys, unless he’s well built, .i.e. hung (LOL).

For me, the swing scene offers a ton of benefits, especially if you enjoy your wife showing off and being able to check out the girls at a party. A big chunk of the women are exhibitionists and being able to show off their bodies without snide remarks is a big plus for them.

Wifey loves to flirt and gets a charge out of “accidentally” showing off to straights at a bar. She never wears a bra and is often commando. So bending over to show off the assets gives her a thrill. When there are several couples at a bar, the girls typically put on a show for everyone. We like our wives to be the center of attention and don’t have to worry about them running off with someone. Plus they know they are safe and protected in case someone gets the wrong idea.

Boredom is a common problem among marrieds. No matter how much fun it is to be with your other half, there’s always a thrill when you are with someone different. It’s called the Seven Year Itch for a reason, and being able to scratch that itch without causing a divorce is a good thing.

While swinging will not fix a bad marriage and will likely finish it off. But, for couples in a stable relationship, it can add spice to a good marriage.

This is Larry Archer signing off till this time next month. Hit me up if you have any questions, or check out my blog at LarryArcher.blog. I’m now on MeWe.com, which is a new uncensored type of FaceBook and uncensored Tumblr combined. My handle is Larry Archer Author or click this link.

MeWe is new but quickly getting their act together. Searching is a little hit or miss, but Google works pretty good, and it’s nice that it’s uncensored and FREE!

Hotwives and cuckolds

by | July 24, 2019 | | 0 Comments

By Larry Archer

Living on the edges of “normality” gives Foxy and me a sometimes different view of the world than a lot of people. There are a lot of unusual kinks we’ve seen, and one of the more common is the cuckold and Hotwife relationship.

ERWA writers have posted several stories about Hotwives lately, and I thought it would be appropriate to throw my 2 cents in the bucket.

The definition of a Hotwife has changed a lot from years ago and, at least from our perspective, is not the poor husband forced to watch in horror as his wife entertains her Bulls. Today it’s more of a spectator sport as the husband watches and jerks off or takes movies of his wife in action.

The wife’s lovers or Bulls as they are called, are typically better endowed and able to satisfy her in ways that her husband cannot do. For a lot of guys, it’s highly erotic to watch your wife in the arms of another man or to have her come home and tell you all about her activities.

Hotwifing often starts with a man enjoying showing off his wife and encouraging her to wear sexy revealing outfits. Then the next step is going to a bar and have his wife sit at the bar, while he sits across the room so he can watch her as guys hit on her. Then maybe they’ll end up in a booth playing grab-ass. From there it’s an easy jump to advancing to the backseat of a car or motel room, where she’ll give out blowjobs or sex.

Afterward, she’ll tell him all about it while he’s getting sloppy seconds or thirds. He’ll enjoy hearing about what his wife has done as he waited in the car for her. The Hotwife is somewhat like an open relationship except the husband is a part of his wife’s cheating activities.

Often the man does not seek out sex with other women but enjoys listening to the stories his wife tells of her escapades with other men and gets his satisfaction from voyeuristic fantasies.

Our best friends are a cuckold – Hotwife couple and she spends a lot of time in bed with us while her husband likes to hide in the closet and watch. For him, spying on his wife and her Bull is a big turn-on even though everyone knows where he’s at. They make no bones about what they enjoy and everyone assumes her husband is in a closet somewhere or peeking in the bedroom window.

He enjoys taking movies of her in action so he can wank off anytime he wants while watching her on his phone. The only problem is he tends to shake the camera as he jerks off with one hand while filming with the other.

His wife is a beautiful blonde with shoulder-length hair, nice boobs, and a slightly voluptuous figure. For a woman in her forties, she’s a knockout and always a hit at a house party.

While swingers don’t generally date or go out without their spouse, it’s a lot more common for Hotwives to do that. They will often meet up at a hotel for a quickie with one or more Bulls and then go home to hubby for a final romp in the hay.

The cuckold will usually have to clean his wife up, and he enjoys the taste of her well-used holes. I think this is a holdover from the early days as the humiliated husband is forced to clean the wife up and accept the fact she’s let her Bulls have her.

Swingers are generally very tolerant of most kinks even if they don’t personally engage in the activity. In general, we are relatively “normal” as an overall group with sub-groups that may focus on specific topics such as BDSM.

Our parties tend to be the same. A typical house party looks like any other party with the exception that people will disappear for periods and you are often not with your spouse but just check-in occasionally. Some couples we know, throw parties where you’re basically expected to shed your clothes at the front door, and you end up in a pile somewhere. We seldom go to these “orgy” parties as it’s not really our scene and my wife is not big on group activities.

Our New Year’s Eve Pajama parties would technically fall under the “orgy” classification except everyone knows that you don’t have to go in the orgy rooms and no one is expected to have to party with others. Even after midnight, when most people are naked or close to it, there is no unwanted grabbing or other inappropriate behavior except between consenting adults.

Certainly, we don’t have an objection to orgies as they are often a lot of fun, but we tend to be more selective about our partners. We’ve introduced a number of couples into the Lifestyle, and they rapidly gravitate to the group that most caters to their needs and desires.

For those who are interested in expanding your horizons, check out my blog at LarryArcher.blog for more info in sharing your wife or hopefully Hotwife. Until this time next month when it’s my day in the barrel once again, have fun and be good (I know those two things are typically exclusive).

Hot Chilli Erotica

Hot Chilli Erotica

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